Mini Devotional | Making a Difference

“But God doesn't call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through.” ― Francis Chan; Crazy Love

More and more each and everyday I realize that I am simply a vessel used by God. I literally am nothing without Him, through Him. I learn that it doesn’t matter how many times I fail, how many times I give up, or how many times I have no earthly clue what I’m doing—He’s going to use me despite all of my mishaps and crazy, only for His purpose.

In fact, He’ll use me even when I’m feeling the most confused and “unusable”.

Sometimes I think that if we were to remind ourselves of this greater purpose on a regular basis, we might see life a bit differently.

I don’t understand why things happen in this world most days, but I can tell you this, God is still alive and well and moving. I know because I see it each and every day. People look at me like I’m crazy, but friends, the things I witness on a regular basis are nothing short of a miracle.

God. Is. Real.

God is alive and well.

I have phone conversations with people I wouldn’t have dreamed of speaking to in 1,000 years, and we talk about dreams and the “greater good”. Some of them pan out, some of them don’t.

But God used me . . . . somehow, in some way, I was used. Those conversations had a purpose. Growth happened inside.

Even something as simple as witnessing a chicken lay an egg, and sharing that with my friends or family—getting back to the land—God used me.

Even in the midst of a conversation with a hurting wife online who needs direction, even if I don’t have all the answers, God used me.

Do you know that no matter what you do or say in this life, nothing matters unless you’re doing it with a greater purpose in mind.

Someone said to me today, “I’m not in the business of entertainment anymore, I’m in the business of making a difference.”

And the flood gates open wide . . . and in that moment, when your heart is completely open to whatever may come your way . . . . God uses you too, friends. He uses us to make a difference.

A lot of the things in life that God asks you to do, or leads you to do, will be simple. But the reality is that we serve an incredibly big God, and sometimes, He’s going to ask us to do incredibly big things when we have no idea how to do them.

“Our greatest fear should not be of failure, but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter.”

So I challenge you right now to think of something that you know God is calling you or asking you to do. You know it. You’ve probably already thought of it in that split second of reading this.

And then, put it on your calendar. Open your heart. And see what God does. See how God uses you. Friend, it’s going to be crazy. But it’s going to be worth it.

Be in the business of doing, of making a difference, not just entertaining the thought of it anymore .

“But God doesn’t call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn’t come through.” ― Francis Chan; Crazy Love

Living Intently Through Grace-Filled Motherhood

Grace-filled motherhood can be hard to live. But it's absolutely attainable. Learn how.

Grace-filled motherhood—it’s something I’ve struggled with over the last few years. I’m quick to give others grace, and to tell others to give themselves grace. But myself? Yeah, no. That’s hard.

When we’re young adults without kids, we think we know everything there is to know about raising children. It’s partially because we still very much remember being kids ourselves. I’d never be that type of parent, we tell ourselves. And then some days our mother flows right out of us and we get slapped upside the head with the wet noodle of reality. But if you’re anything like me, you think back to the times when your parents were right, and you were wrong. And to the times when you were right, and your parents were wrong.

Read the Post

When God Pursues You

I woke up that morning with more heaviness on my heart. It’s not uncommon for me to have dreams, especially since I’m normally in and out of sleep constantly during the night. But this was just one more dream to add to the list over the last few weeks that had the same theme over and over again. What did all of this mean? 

I’m not one to dream about my family or myself. I often dream weird dreams that make no sense, and they remind me that I shouldn’t eat chocolate cake before bedtime. Yeah, those kind of dreams.

But these were different.

In the first dream, that I can remember, I was running away from something and taking my family with me (my husband and son). I was frantic, but they didn’t seem too bothered about it. They were calm and peaceful, and I was a frightened mess.

In the next dream, there was a new person. A person from my past. Someone I hadn’t seen in years. What on earth is this guy doing here, I thought to myself. But even he was pretty calm and collected.

Several dreams came and went, all of me and several people in my life (family or past friends) running and hiding somewhere. Trying to get away from someone or something.

But I can remember one of the final dreams vividly . . . because I was suddenly running all alone.

In this dream, all of these people were gone. I was the only one running. All by myself.

I woke up. And even though I knew it was just a dream, I sat there and wondered, why did everyone leave me? And even more so, what on earth am I running from?

I knew I was running from “someone”, but I could never figure out who or, maybe more importantly, why?

It upset me. This was torture. Never in my life have I ever had so many dreams one after the other after the other, with the same theme, different locations, random people, but very much all about me. I had come to the conclusion that I was either eating something totally wrong before I went to bed, or my mind was in a state of stress from all the things I’ve been doing. I mean, it’s not like writing two books in a year, planning a major homesteading/farming conference and fair, being a wife and mom and boss, weren’t overwhelming enough. Now, I had this weighing on me?

The next day was Sunday. Good. Time to go to church and start a brand new week all over again. Except recently I’d found myself thinking more about work and things I had to get done while listening to a sermon, rather than focusing on the sermon that my soul so desperately needed.

I shook my head a little bit, as if to wake myself out of the brain fog, and abruptly started paying attention to our amazing pastor and the sermon he’d prepared for us that day.

“…and sometimes we don’t think God is talking to us, but did you know that God can talk to us in dreams?”

Whoa hey, mister, get out of my head! I looked around, almost as if to see other people’s reactions. It always gets a little weird when we start talking about God talking to us. Our poor Vice President Pence was recently told that he had a mental illness because he believes the God of the universe speaks to him.

But it was just me. I was the only one looking around, as best I could tell. It was as if I was in a room and everyone else was standing still. It was as if God was talking directly to me, all of a sudden.

It wasn’t weird for me. I totally “got it”.

Call me crazy, but I’ve had plenty of dreams where I have gone to people I’ve dreamed about (and not the everyday average dream), told them about it, and had them fall apart and tell me how much they needed to hear about that dream right there in that moment. There have been other times where I’ve shared a dream and it didn’t make any sense at all, until years later.

But why, here, in this moment, was I so absent minded that these dreams could actually be for a reason? Dreams for a purpose? This torture of a dream that I’d been walking through, could it have been torture because I just wasn’t “getting it?” Because I wasn’t in-tune with what was happening?

You’d think, wouldn’t  you, that I’d go home and I’d “get it” and I’d pray before bed that night and everything would be grand. But no, I didn’t.

We went to lunch, we went home, and that evening I didn’t pray. In fact, I hadn’t been praying much at all in recent weeks. Instead, my thoughts were filled with things I needed to get done, things that didn’t get done, places I needed to be, things I needed to create and do and . . . and . . .

. . . and there seemed to be less and less time for God.

A week or so passed, and this trend continued. I’d find various quiet moments where I’d say a little prayer throughout the day. I’d even fit in talking with God like, “dear Jesus give me strength before I smack somebody,” type of talking to God. It was always on my time. It was always when it was convenient. And that was ok, right? I mean, God knows I love Him and cherish Him and, yeah, like, Jesus is my homeboy.

But no, no, it wasn’t good enough.

I wasn’t connecting with God anymore. I had become, what the Bible calls, “a babbling prayer.” (Matthew 6:7)

Nighttime came, once again. Another dream came, once again. But this time, it wasn’t anything I was running from. This time, it was something I was running towards, and it wasn’t something I should’ve been running towards. Something I had seen in a previous dream. A hindrance. An idea or minuscule thought that was leading me into comparison, disconnection and yet, unnecessary connection, and ultimately, a vivid image of being lost. An imagery of choosing one thing over the other. The imagery of being alone and vulnerable. The imagery of not allowing myself to be pursued in the dreams before it—of being pursued by God.

I opened my eyes, sat up in bed, and that’s when it all made sense.

I was being pursued by a God who doesn’t force Himself into your life. Who doesn’t force you to connect with Him and share your life with Him. But who pursues you, constantly, until you simply choose not to be pursued any longer.

And even then, He still calls to us. He still wants to draw near to us.

…he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us… [James 4:5]

He was quietly calling for me the entire time. Ushering me into His presence. Begging for His child to call out to Him, to spend time with Him. And all this child did was keep running. Running to the next project, running to the next job, running to the next batch of laundry that needed folding, running to the next chapter of the book that needed writing.

And eventually, with each new run, He got further and further away. I was aimlessly running further and further away, and I had no idea just how far I’d gotten. Like a kid in a store that runs away from a parent . . . I was losing it.

Scripture tells us that when we draw near to God, God will draw near to us (James 4:8). But even more so, scriptures tell us exactly how God speaks to us, how he draws near to us…

In the sermon that morning, a few Sundays back, our Pastor focused on this passage from the book of Job, and to set it all in place, I want to share it with you now.

For God does speak—now one way, now another—
    though no one perceives it.
In a dream, in a vision of the night,
    when deep sleep falls on people
    as they slumber in their beds,
he may speak in their ears
    and terrify them with warnings,
to turn them from wrongdoing
    and keep them from pride,
to preserve them from the pit,
    their lives from perishing by the sword.
[Job 33:14-18]

One of the most beautiful scriptures of the way God pursues us is Psalm 139, where it says, Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.”  (Psalm 139:7-8) And the truth is exactly that—that no matter where we are, or where we go, God is right there pursuing us. He’s right there waiting for us to talk to Him; waiting for us to come unraveled into the hands of the Almighty Savior of the world, who never once asked us to do life all on our own. 

In fact, He knows we can’t do life all on our own . . . and He’s never wanted us to.

And so, I prayed. I prayed like I hadn’t prayed to Him in weeks . . . because, well, I hadn’t.

Imagine that—a woman who seemed so “put together” and on the right track in this Christian life, and even she was in the midst of focusing on so many things, other than God.

Friend, whoever you are, and for whatever reason you’re reading this, I want you to know that God is pursuing you. He has never stopped pursuing you.

He is pursuing your mind, and your heart, and quickening your spirit. Even when you are ever so close to God, even still, He pursues you. And even if you are so far removed from Him that you think, He could never take me back, I promise you, He’s already right there, pursuing you.

Maybe, just maybe, it’s us who need to stop running from the pursuit. Because this pursuit is one that you don’t want to run from.

Embrace it in all it’s glory, in all your mess. Because grace sure can be messy, but oh, how beautiful it is to finally be caught up by the God who relieves our burdens, gives us peace, and loves us no matter where we are.

And maybe, just maybe, He’s been speaking to you all along . . .


Want to listen to the sermon I talk about in this blog post?

Click here to go to the sermon page, and then click on the sermon titled 
“Struggling to Hear”


Herbal Remedies Aren’t God

I laid in bed with my palm pushing on the side of my head. This pain that would shoot down the side of my head, down my face, into my back and neck—it was absolutely, and definitely, one of the worst pains I had ever experienced in my entire life. I tried everything to make it go away. I tried my essential oils, I tried herbs, I tried herbal massage rubs, I tried over the counter pain killers—nothing was touching it. Absolutely nothing.

I was dizzy, nauseous, and an emotional basket-case because I couldn’t fix myself. Of course, you wouldn’t have known it unless you were my husband, because I try my hardest to keep it together as much as possible.

Two days I went through this. Two days. Until finally Mark looked at me and said, “let’s go, we’re going to the ER.”

And I agreed with him…

We drove up the road that afternoon in silence. I know he hates hospitals. He absolutely hates them. They make him twitchy, anxious, and overwhelmed. He becomes moody, nervous, and angry when we step foot into a hospital, but he was going for me. I don’t know why he gets that way, he just does. It’s hard for him, and I respect things that I don’t understand. I especially respect him. But he was beside me and that’s what mattered most. That’s what team work looks like. That’s what marriage looks like.
We got to the ER, at which point I was placed in a very drafty night gown and hooked up to IVs. I was feeling a little better at this point, but it was just the body’s defense going into ramp it up mode. The adrenaline rush was pumping extra blood to the brain, which was expanding the arteries, which was in return, taking some of the pain away.
I had convinced myself that I had had a brain aneurysm or something. Tumor? Cancer? Brain eating bacteria? Had to be something like that, right? It had to be something complicated since I couldn’t fix it myself.
I was kicking myself that I couldn’t heal this on my own at home. Here I am, constantly talking about herbalism and essential oils, and taking control of your healthcare, and yet here I was sitting in an emergency room bed without any control over what my body was doing, or even how to start the healing process.
Five hours and one CT Scan later, I was fine. Everything was ok upstairs. Well, that’s still debatable, but there were no brain eating bacteria that they could see, at least. The craziness? Well, that’s still there.
They shoved some high-tech pain meds in my hand (I asked for the extra strength tylenol, not the loopy stuff!), told me I was having some type of muscular or nerve reacting migraine, and sent me on my way. They also told me to follow up with a neurologist. Oops, that was a long time ago. But I’ve been ok since then.
I got home that night and laid quietly in bed.
I cried.
I cried because I couldn’t sleep. I cried because I couldn’t fix myself. I cried because I hated having to go to the hospital and subject my body to even more yucky germs. I cried because my husband, bless his heart, was tired and still had to go to work the next day. I cried because I was mad. I was so mad. I was so mad that nothing I tried at home helped me. Nothing. What a failure I thought I was.
I prayed and cried some more.
I had a pretty big heart to heart with God, not just about my health, but about life in general. I was broken in so many ways other than this pain in my head. I had been dealing with so much on my plate. Why was I just now coming to Him? Why didn’t I come to Him sooner? Now I felt guilty about that too…
I often tell our son that God isn’t some big man up in the sky who is constantly looking at the bad things you’ve done. In fact, we are often times harder on ourselves than He is on us. But it’s easier to say that to someone else than it is to yourself.
The next morning I was feeling much better. Still in a little pain, but bearable. I went about my daily routine, and as I walked into the bathroom to start scrubbing the toilet, I looked up to where my herbal remedies were setting at the time, and I was faced with a very real and emotional reality.

Herbal remedies aren’t God.

And it was a hard and raw reality that slapped me in the face. It was convicting, it was numbing.
So often we get into herbal remedies because we want a healthier lifestyle for our family. We’ve taken control of our food source with chickens, dairy animals, and gardens. The next step is taking control of your healthcare and adding herbal remedies and essential oils to your family’s life. But what happens when they don’t work? Or worse yet, what happens when we turn them into idols above our very own Creator and Ultimate Healer?
Ouch to the idolater that I’d become. Ouch to the Christian that I had become, leaning more on herbal remedies than on my very own Savior. Ouch to the person I had become who had missed opportunities to talk about Christ with people who were looking for a more holistic lifestyle.
That was almost one-year ago.
And while I fully believe that God gave us plants to use for health and healing (Ez. 47:12), I also know that we can very quickly turn even a good thing into a bad thing if the motive behind it isn’t pure, or if we’re trying to take the easy way out. We can become so quick to want to control our own circumstances, that we forget we have a God who wants to connect with us on a regular basis—a God who created us all. A God who wants to help us, heal us, and love on us. The Creator gave us herbs to help us, but in His goodness and mercy, He reminds us that we are nothing without Him.
In the same respect, I was hosting a live chat on my YouTube channel recently, and someone mentioned to me all of the health issues they encounter on a regular basis. They wanted to know which essential oils to use, and questioned if there were herbs or diet changes that would help as well. I sat there and probably looked dumbfounded. The entire time I was running different oils and herbs through my head—on a live show, mind you—but I was thinking, you don’t need herbal remedies, you need modern medicine and the good Lord.
It’s ok to depend on modern medicine for your needs, in case you didn’t know. Just like it’s ok to depend on herbal remedies for your needs. But it is not ok to idolize either of the two, because ultimately, God is our healer. All things are given by Him and through Him. Both are equally valuable, but too much of either is equally dangerous.
Don’t believe me that modern medicine is from God? Consider this; penicillin was discovered by accident in one of the greatest times of need for it in the history of medicine. It was literally discovered because Dr. Alexander Fleming returned back from vacation in 1928 to an extremely dirty laboratory that he had left behind. While cleaning up, he discovered mold growing on his petri dishes. Bam! Penicillin was discovered to kill bacteria, and the rest of the story is history…literally.
That, my friends, is what we call a miracle.
Yes, a miracle.
What are the odds of a doctor randomly going on vacation, coming back to find a messy laboratory, finding mold growing on the very petri dishes that had infectious bacteria growing on it, and saying, “hey I’ll take a look at this under the microscope.” Only to find the mold was eating away the bacteria.
Even Mr. Fleming tells you it was a complete and total freak accident. But I tell you, it was God.
We know now, in the 21st century, that antibiotics are overly used, which causes antibiotic resistant bacteria. See, even a good thing can become a bad thing when used more than it should be. But it stems from the mindset that we can control it all. My goodness, look where that control is leading us. We’ve become a generation that is reaping the consequences of antibiotic resistance and overuse, and it’s not pretty. It’s why so many people are trying to get back to herbalism.
I don’t know what your life looks like. I don’t know if you believe in herbal remedies, modern medicine, both, or neither. But I will tell you that without the grace and mercy of the Creator of the Universe, there would be none of it. And when we feel ourselves idolizing one or the other, or anything other than Him, it may be time to step back and reevaluate ourselves. Sometimes, I believe God allows us to walk through difficulties in order to bring us closer to Him. Other times, we walk through difficulties because of our own personal consequences. But through it all, He is still good and holy and righteous. God is still God. And none of this is possible without Him….ever.
When herbal remedies don’t work, it’s ok to go to the doctor. When modern medicine doesn’t work, it’s ok to try herbal remedies. But through it all, I hope you’ll remember, just as I had to, to connect with the greatest Healer ever. Even when nothing else works, even when the results are bad and the outcome is grim, there is still God. And God is still good. And in your greatest time of desperation and need, the joy, strength, love, and goodness of the Lord is far better than any doctors orders, roller bottle of essential oil, or herbal tincture.
I promise…



“Give it a try…,” whisper’s the heart.

I am dog tired this morning. I am exhausted, my body aches, I have a headache (on top of other womanly issues today), and the cloudy sky is not a friend to my already downtrodden body.
I woke up early, made husband his coffee and lunch — drank a quart of coffee myself, it seemed.
My eyes are still scratchy from dusting 38 chickens with Sevin dust yesterday…yes, Sevin dust. Don’t judge me unless you’ve got good reason…because when there are hundreds of lice crawling on a few chickens, you must kill them or douse yourself in gasoline…one or the other. That’s a whole other story, don’t get me started. I’m getting over it slowly, but I learned my lesson the hard way when bringing new chickens into our flock, even if from a trusted source.
My week has been anything but routine. And it shows in my dirty floor, kitchen sink, and the water that’s standing on the bathroom floor from my 4 year old “brushing his teeth”.
My 4 year old will be 5 at the end of this month.
And time continues….
I felt defeated before I ever woke up this morning, and then I opened my Bible…
I’ve been on a journey of learning about David and Solomon. I really don’t know why. But ever since I finished my Job study, I’ve been reading about David and Solomon. What started as a Bible study about Solomon, quickly turned into something so much more. But it has taken me this long to get back on track with it….months.
As I sit here and crack my neck, trying to get the stiffness out…
I haven’t talked to God much this week. But I see Him everywhere.
In the tomatoes that are blossoming on my vines. In the pup hiding Jr’s toys in a freshly dug hole. In the patience I have when I wash the dog off with the hose, calmly telling myself, “this too will pass, enjoy it”. 
I see Him in Jr’s innocence….in his smile when he holds his BB gun, and says, “mama, take a photo of me”.
But when I opened my Bible this morning, there He was. Right there in front of me….with arms as wide open as they were when I last left Him...too long ago.
I started reading the Psalms this morning, after going through chapters in previous books about kings and wars and nothing that really had my attention. There He was…
I know that my God watches over us, even when we aren’t faithful to Him. He is so incredibly faithful to us. He has never ever left us or forsaken us.
And somehow, a little bit of strength comes, but not my own….
When I closed my Bible this morning, I got on facebook. Naturally…duh.
But God was there too.

So many of you know some of the struggles I’ve been dealing with over the past year. Some of you have been going through them with me as well.

And I kept seeing this quote, all.over.facebook. this morning. It was everywhere. Every page I clicked on, every time I refreshed my newsfeed….other’s had posted and reposted it.

So many times, even this morning, I told myself these things…
It’s impossible…
It’s too risky…I’m happy with my life right now.
It’s pointless, even if I did want it badly enough, it would never happen.
In fact, I was saying those same exact things this morning when I saw this quote….
And I read another Psalm…

“When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers,the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them?”

I saw a woman post a pregnancy test this morning, but it wasn’t the “oh look we’ve been trying for a month and I’m already pregnant,” post…

She explained her joy as a miracle, how she had been infertile for over 10 years, and now, completely taken off guard, she was expecting, simply due to the fact that she has changed her lifestyle into a healthy all natural one.

And I cried.

And I laughed.

And I rejoiced with her, because my week had been far from easy, and I needed something to rejoice in.

I rejoiced with her because the angels were rejoicing with her.

And there was God, and my heart whispered….“give it a try…”

Not just in fertility.

Not just in a healthier lifestyle, which we have already started.

Not just in tending to farm animals, raising our own food, trying to go all organic and chemical free, or in homesteading.

Not in trying to keep the floors mopped, dishes done, laundry put away….

Not just in taking time out to just “be” with my Savior.

But in everything…

What is man, that you are mindful of him? That you care for him? You created the heavens and the earth…the stars rest in your hands. What am I, who am I, that You should even care about my hurts, my pains, my frustrations, and the stiffness in my neck?

I am constantly amazed by the God I serve…the one who came to serve, rather than be served.

I am constantly amazed by Him, because He cares for me, even though He doesn’t have to…

…He cares for me, because I am His daughter…

…He cares for me, even when I could care less about Him…

And so, in the stillness of the morning, my heart whispers, “…give it a try.”

And there He is….


When God is Silent….

It happens to all of us at some point in our lives. Some of us more than others….

That drowning feeling that God doesn’t listen…

…that God doesn’t answer prayers.
…that God doesn’t care.

…that God doesn’t understand my needs, my wants, my heartache.

…that if God cared so much about me, He would make me a better person, a better friend, a better wife, a better mother, a better Christian.

…that God doesn’t care about me as much as I thought He did, otherwise, He wouldn’t let these things happen.

…that God doesn’t speak to me, answer me, or hold me close.

It happens to all of us.

But what if He does….

What if, in the midst of our struggles, our heartache, our pain, or daily life….what if He is speaking to us, answering us, loving us, caring for us?

I always hear the phrase, “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle.”. I’ve even had people tell me it’s in the Bible.

….it’s not.

The scripture that people often refer to for this quote is 1 Corinthians 10:13. It’s a great scripture, but it’s speaking of sin, not of the non-sin related struggles we deal with — death, pain, sickness, a broken heart…

In fact, it’s just the opposite.

God promises heartache, suffering, pain, persecution, hatred.

Some God, huh?

Actually, He’s amazing.

Because even during those quiet moments when you think you can’t go on….your heart still beats.

Even during those moments when your heart literally feels like it’s going to ache out of your chest…your lungs still take in air. Breathing in and out.


Your heart knows why it’s beating…

Your lungs know why they are breathing…

And the fact that your fragile body is still functioning on its own, it should be enough for you to realize how much of a miracle you really are. You’re still here…..we still have a purpose.

And yet, He is still silent…..

…and you’re still questioning His reasoning and purpose through every struggle.

Here’s the mind blowing thing…

“‘For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,’ says the Lord.
‘For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.
‘For as the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven,
And do not return there,
But water the earth,
And make it bring forth and bud,
That it may give seed to the sower
And bread to the eater,
So shall My word be that goes forth from My mouth;
It shall not return to Me void,
But it shall accomplish what I please,
And it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.'”

[Isaiah 55:8-11] 

And then we get to Paul…oh, Paul….

“Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” [2 Corinthians 12:8-10]

Paul says in Philippians 4:13, that he can do all things through Christ.

Or what about John 15:5 where Jesus says “without Me, you can do nothing”….

Breathing in…..breathing out….heart still beating….

Paul knew it….

“For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height— to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. 

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” [Ephesians 3]

God will give us more than we can handle. Often….

We have a God that loves to love us, cherish us, give to us, and heal us. We have a God that performs miracles today, just as He did 2,000 years ago. We have a God who saves us more times than we can count, because, after all, He wouldn’t be protecting us if we were always confronted with what He’s protecting us from.

He still answers prayers. Even yours…

He still loves you.

He still hears you.

He still cares.

But His purpose has never, ever, changed.

….to bring glory to the name of Jesus…that He would be glorified through it all. Even when He is silent…

…to bring others into the knowledge of Christ, so that one day, they can enter through those pearly gates right along with us.

It’s hard to think about when we’re so selfish. We were born with the need to be needed…to be taken care of….to be loved. But have we forgotten what our purpose really is?

Your story can change someone’s life. That doesn’t mean you have to accept it. That doesn’t mean you don’t get to mourn, get angry, have a little talk with God about “why me”.

But it does mean you have to get back up. You have to fight the good fight…run the good race. It does mean that you are called to be a disciple of Jesus Christ, even when you don’t want to be.

Your situation doesn’t define your identity in Christ.
Your situation refines your identity in Christ.

The quote above, “….even when God is silent”, speaks so much to my heart. The quote was found on the walls of a concentration camp. I can imagine it was scribbled there by the fragile, dirt caked hands of a Jewish man or woman….wondering when their last breath would be….where their children are….when their God would save them.

And in that moment, they felt their heart beating….their lungs rising….up and down….and they remembered….

Maya Angelou once said, “Listen to yourself, and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God.”

God does allow more than we can handle. The world gives us more than we can handle. And the hardest moments are the ones when the world is ringing so loudly in our ears that we can’t hear our hearts beating through the noise.

The hardest moments are the one’s where, we have forgotten about God…and yet we’re the ones who think He’s left us….we’re the ones who think He’s not answering.

But through Him, we have strength.

We have peace.

We have joy.

We have purpose.

So through it all, even when I am weak, even when the world piles it on….I will boast all the more gladly….because when I am weak, He is strong.

Through it all, I will aim to glorify God. Because after all, that is all He asks of me.

Through it all, I will remember that, maybe He is silent because I stopped listening.

…and maybe, just maybe, He is silent…because He is listening….

…and at the end of my days, no matter what the hurt, the pain, the heartache, the struggles….it will all fade away when He whispers in my ear…. “well done, my good and faithful servant”….

….well done….

To the mother watching her child lay in a hospital bed, wondering when his last breath will be. Stretched to the max with tired eyelids and a broken heart. Whispering fragile prayers of miraculous healing that hasn’t yet come….

To the grandmother aching with pain from cancer, but still singing praises through it all….

To the sister watching her siblings family do a nose dive away from Christ, don’t go that way, soaking her pillow with tears every single evening, and ending her prayer with “be glorified”

To the wife who just watched her husband walk out of their front door for the very last time, wishing she would have kissed him instead of yelling at him….there will be no more kisses…or yelling….as she quietly bows her head in mourning…. “Your ways are not my ways…there must be a reason”….

To the woman sitting in her bedroom, hanging her head, questioning her purpose…“I’m a bad mother, I’m a bad wife, why me, Lord?”….who suddenly feels her heart beating and her mind at ease….and she praises Him…gets up…and starts a brand new day.

…well done, good and faithful servant….well done….


Free UPS Shipping on all Footwear at Tractor Supply. Online Only. Shop Now!


follow me @amy.fewell

Copyright © 2019 · Theme by 17th Avenue

Password Reset
Please enter your e-mail address. You will receive a new password via e-mail.